App-solutely App-surd: This is how the Apps are taking over!

Don’t get me wrong; I am a big fan of apps. I rely on apps for the simplest of things. Grocery shopping? I have an app for that. I plan my weekly list and share with my grocery shopping partner (husband of course!). Let’s ignore the fact that what we finally buy, is completely reliant on the shopper’s whim. (For example, this weekend I asked for half kg red onion. Instead, I was rewarded with a 5 kg sack of yellow onions, because it was on sale). The fact that I wanted to make a salad that required red onion is a different story for another time.

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But Apps have become my best friend

Kid whining in the backseat of the car? Peppa app jumps to life.
Have an ice cream craving? App tells me which turn to take for the 1575 calories that I must then shed on the treadmill for 45 minutes (Yup, you guessed it! An App told me)

These days, the husband prefers calendar invites for everything: Hair cut, kid’s doc check up, or dentist appointment. If these things are not in his “calendar,” I cannot hold him liable for not doing it.

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Recently, I downloaded a new calorie counter app. I wanted to jot down everything. What was the problem with my old calorie counter app you ask? It was not “desi” enough.

So when I ate Kadhai Chicken, or Rajma for dinner, I had to add “Black Beans” or “chicken in butter cream sauce” in the app. My Bestie suggested this “desi” one, and voila! I had a moment with my phone, when I started typing ‘Ilish’ (Hilsa) and it suggested “Ilish Macher shorshebata jhol”.. I mean wow! I had tears of joy!

So after my honeymoon period with my app was over, I noticed subtle details about it. And now, I am convinced someone who designed this app has the soul of a desi mom, otherwise, why would it tell me things like “Did you drink a glass of water?”And If I told it, I drank tea; it tells me: ” Tomorrow you could try warm water with a pinch of lemon” 

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It reminds me to eat breakfast, lunch, and happily tells me “It is dinner time”! On top of that, it adds, “You are probably very hungry, but do not gobble your food”.

But the following incident happened today and left me speechless!!

Earlier in my post, I mentioned how I switched apps, from my “global” calorie counter app to “desi” version. Now the global app also kept sending me notifications like Log your breakfast. Add what you had for lunch, but with my new found love, I ignored its notifications for over a week. And guess what I received today?

“It seems you don’t find our notifications helpful; we won’t bother you anymore.” I mean this is classic high school!!

I was sincerely attending a meeting, and this notification totally cracked me up! 

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Well, who could have guessed that two calorie counter apps now can have different personalities! One is mom like, while the other acts up like a teenager

I know, I know what you must be thinking! Why install them in the first place? Well, like millions of other people in this world, I have “befriended” these technical bots, and have intimate conversations with them, instead of calling up my mom or my best friend. And now, when I have to deal with their mood swings, the joke is totally on me!

What apps do you use? What are your thoughts on “app”ifying our lives? In Blank Slate Chronicles, we will talk more about how apps are creeping into our lives. Do drop in your thoughts and suggestions!

 

About Moumita Chakraborty

Moumita is gritty and persevering, besides being a subject matter expert on anything she sets her heart to. Her writing style pins on her empathy for the subject and fluidity of thought. She is great with people, which makes her a fabulous feature author and a Partner Relations expert.

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